The Wife Picker

The Gaffner Chaos is a perfect match up of two girls and two boys.
Our two oldest, the girls, are excellent care-givers and brilliant young ladies.
Our two youngest, the boys, are comedians and sweet talkers.
This could be a dangerous combination.

Both Dean and Christopher know how to melt the hearts and minds of women of all ages.
I witnessed it today in the Chick-Fil-A playplace as Christopher drew the attention of every little girl that came in the door. One little girl just held his hand. And he let her. What a flirt.

Dean was the same way and currently has nearly every church lady and girl wrapped around his naughty little finger. He knows he is funny and they both know they are cute. Truly, we are in for a rough ride! My admitted weak spots for my sons leaves me with nothing but trouble and I know it. But I am incapable of changing the way they make me smile and laugh. I am a mom pansy.

One day I imagine that my sons will marry and their future wives may loath the way I have babied them, but according to Dean, I will be the one that picks their wives out. This could work out nicely!

The other day as we sat and enjoyed an early afternoon movie, the couple on screen leaned in for a kiss. Dean stared even after I told him to close his eyes. He kept staring and finally I said, "Dean Kelly, you better not kiss on any girls". Dean looked at me and said, "That's right. I can only kiss momma". I quickly replied, "Yes you can kiss only mommy". Perplexed, he got up and came to stand in front of me. He said, "But one day won't I get married? And then I will have to kiss my wife?" I sighed, "Yes, one day you will get married and I guess it will be okay to kiss your wife". He smiled back and gave me the greatest gift of permission to ever be given a mother. He said, "Will you pick my wife out for me?"

Why yes Dean. Yes I will.
I should have secured this in writing for future reference.
But alas, my only proof exists in my memory. It may not guarantee his end of such a bargained request.

It is hard to imagine my boys being old enough to marry. Especially when at this point, they are not old enough to do anything on their own. But one day, a day that will come too quickly, my boys will leave the confines of their childhood home. Though I would love to be the "wife picker" for Dean and Christopher, I know that God will continue to grow and develop my baby boys into young men and they will pick a wife all on their own.

And yet.

To the future wife of Dean Kelly and the future wife of Christopher Warren,
Keep a large stock of poptarts.
Do not throw away their belongings without asking.
Buy ear plugs. They are loud.
Nuggets are the only thing worthy of lunch time menus.
They lose socks.
They lose shoes.
Don't look at them when they are sweet-talking you. You won't be able to resist their eyes.

Love them unconditionally.
Care for them when they are sick.
Offer understanding even when you aren't sure that you truly do.
Listen.
Be patient, sometimes they need a little positive reinforcement.
Encourage them to do great things.
Pray for them everyday.

Signed, The Wife Picker.